I love you but you love her
by Silver Mystic
Summary: I think I'm on chapter 13 ...and keep in mind I OWN NOTHING!...the poetry kina ends after chapter 3.Pome. The PG13 becuase of laungau and fixing to go up.
1. Kagome's Dairy

My P.O.V

Kagome sat by the campfire, rummaging through her over sized bag tell she found what she was looking for. She pulled out a dark blue velvet book that had baby blue letters spelling out '_Diary_'.  She smiled sadly at the memories it held, then opining up to a fresh page she got a pen and began to write.

**_I love  
I love you from a distant   
No closer then that  
I love for who you are  
No less then that  
I love you now and always  
But do you love me back?  
No not me I am not the one  
The one your heart calls out to   
I love you I see only you  
But you can only see her  
She the one who hates you  
The one who can never love you  
Maybe there was a time  
A time when you two where happy  
Happy for a moment a mere second in time  
You loved her for who she was  
But she loved you only for what you would become  
You would set her free  
Free of every thing that binds her to responsibility  
You where her escape  
Not her love  
These things I see in her   
You cannot  
Or maybe you  
Maybe you can but deny  
For as they say 'love is blind'  
I do not dear voice any of this out loud  
At times I think maybe you do care  
Maybe you are over her  
You say you wish to protect me  
But is it really me you wish to protect  
Or is it that you see me as her    
You say harsh things   
That you don't mean  
Or do you?  
Do you see me as week?  
As some pathetic,   
Close but not quit the real thing,  
A replacement of her?  
I now I can never measure up to her,  
Her beauty,  
Her strength,  
Her breviary,  
Her grace,  
She has every thing including your love  
Maybe not every thing  
But she has the one thing I long for  
More then any thing else  
But unlike her I love you  
For simply that   
Being you.  
Don't you see?  
Can't you see?  
Of course not….  
You still only see her  
I know you will never love me  
The way I want  
I may be wrong   
You may in time love me  
For me and not just her  
Maybe tomorrow…  
But then again tomorrow never comes  
I love you heart and soul  
Now and forever  
You who are my first love  
You who are forever in my heart  
And always on my mind  
You who haunt my dreams  
And crash my reality  
I love you  
And only want to see you happy  
But she who you love will only hurt you  
And I won't let her   
Hasn't she done enough?  
She takes peoples souls  
Kill so she may live  
Live to kill you  
I WON'T LET HER  
To you hear me?  
No of course not……….._**

****

_'I don't know where to classify this as a diary entry or a bad attempt at poetry.' _Kagome thought to her self mildly amused.

"Hey wench, go to bed I don't want ya complaining in the mooring that you're tiered" Inuyasha interrupted her. Kagome set the book back in her bag with a sigh and settled in her sleeping bag careful not to wake Shippo. 

"Goodnight Inuyasha" she said then add '_My love_' to her self, as she fell in to the world of dreams. 

A/N: I OWN NOTHING! NOTHING! Well……lets put it this way, I don't own Inuyasha.


	2. Inuyasha

InuYasha P.O.V 

Inuyasha was again sitting in a tree watching over those how lie just beneath it.  He looks up to the sky, to the stars then to the moon. '_Three days_' he things, '_three days and then I'm human again *_sigh*_  how can I protect her if I stuck in a weak body_'. His ears twitch as he hears a sound. Look to where it's coming from he see Kagome rummaging through her oversized pack again. '_I wonder if she has any more ramen? Hell I wonder about half the stuff she puts in there…what is she doing?_' He question him self as she pulls out a dark blue book with light blue lettering. 

'_Huh? Ugg…not another spell book, I don't like that one most of her book make her smell board. But that one whenever she pulls it out she always smells sad or aroused and I don't like either, it makes what to do things to her. What the hell could possible make her smell like that…it better not be that Hoho boy If he did something to make her sad I'll kill 'em, and if it is him that make her excited I'll kill him for that too. She has no idea what she dose when she's like that._'

He watched as she continued to write then growls to him self as he notices that she getting sad again.' _I knew it damn it I HAET IT WHEN SHE- huh, WHAT THE HELL SHE GOSE FROM SAD TO DETERMEND….I will never understand her…feh women'_

"Hey wench, go to bed I don't want ya complaining in the mooring that your tiered" She set her book back in her pack and with a sigh settled into her sleeping bag careful not to disturb Shippo '_feh luck kit'_ he thought with some bitterness. 

"Goodnight Inuyasha" then fell to sleep leaving the half dog demon to his thoughts. '_Goodnight Kagome, my love'_. Looking up to the stars once again he makes a silent wish that he could protect her and his friends and that maybe he could finally tell Kagome what was really in his heart.   

A/N: Is it Inuyasha or InuYasha? Or does it not really matter?


	3. Pome

Sunset blooms

On open fields

Drops of silver

Moonlights rain

Angles cry

Tears of blood

Tainted souls

Tortured minds 

Hope is dim

But not lost

If you give me at lest 5 reviews I'll continue this story it not then this is the end of it.


	4. Why?

**Kagome P.O.V.**

'_Why?_' was the only thought that ran thought the girls mind as she look out the window to the blackened skies that opened up and let heavens tears descend. A single tear escaped and ran down her cheek but didn't stop there, that was merely a warning as more and more fell. Yet she made not a sound simply starred blankly out at the night, asking her self '_why?_' but never receiving an answer. And as the night drowned on the heavens continued to weep for the girls torn soul. 

The sun began to rise above the horizon. As the light hit the slumbering teen's face her eyes began to open to the new day. Looking around she wonder when she had fallen asleep. For she was in a rather uncomfortable spot on her window seal. '_I have no more tears to cry. Even if I did I wound not let them fall he has made his chose and if he's happy then I wont stand in his way_.' She thought with a sad smile. 

'_The sunrise brings forth the beginning of a new day. It doesn't matter what happened yesterday or the day before. You can always start over. Mistakes can be forgotten and lives can begin again. Something bad happened and I want to forget it. But I can't, because if I did I would forget all my friends and him. I could never forget him no matter what. Besides how can I know if I'm truly happy if I don't know what it's like to be sad? OK that's a load of crap but hell I have to come up with something to make myself fell better…then again there is always death by chocolate ice-cream, and I must say not a bad way to go. I needed a reason to make a new start anyway a new start would be a good thing I think_.' 

The girl stud up took a deep breath to compost her self.  '_First things first, a hot bath and simi-decent breakfast, and a tight top and short skirt. And on to the mall' _With her plan in mind she when into her bather connected to her room and stared a bath bubbles and all. ' _Now what was that saying… If you love something, set it free, If it doesn't return then it was never meant to be. Yeah that's it, but I'm starting to think that him and how ever came up with_ "The truth shall set you free" _where ether heavily medicated, on drugs or drooped repeatedly on there head as a child. Great I'm talking to myself, peachy, oh a peach that sounds good_' Striping out of her clothes from yesterday she settles down into the nice bath, and for the first time in a while she began to relax, well tried to. 

Everything was quite save the slight `swish` of the water ever now and then. '_Who the hell I'm I kidding I love him and that's not going away. I can't just put it out of my mind and suddenly be happy. Damn my heart, I just had to falling for the one I can't have._' She blinked back tears from her eyes that are shadowed with heartbreak.  '_Why can't you love me, Why do you chose her over me?_'  She bit her lip to keep from crying. ' _I won't cry, I wont!_'  She began to sing softly to her self.

"Ate monaku sama yotte ita   
Tegakari monaku sagashi tsuzuketa   
Anata ga kureta omoi de o   
Kokoro o iyasu uta nishite 

Yakusoku mo suru koto monaku   
Kawasu koto bamo kimetari mosezu   
Dakishime soshite tashika mete   
Hibiwa nido to kaeranau 

Kioku no naka no te ofuru anata wa   
Watashi no namae o yobuko toga deki runo

Afureru sono namida o   
Kagaya kuyuu kini kaete   
Inochi wa tsuzuku   
Yoruo koe uta gau koto nonai   
Ashitare totsuzuku

Tobu tori no mukou no sorade   
Ikutsu no kioku azuke tada rou   
Hakanai kibou mo yume mo   
Todokanai basyo ni wasurete

Meguri aunowa guuzen toi e runo?   
Wakareru toki ga kanarazu kuru noni 

Kieyuku unmei demo   
Kimi ga ikiteiru kagiri   
Inochi watsuzuku   
Eien ni sono chikara no kagiri   
Doko made mo 

Watashi ga shinou tomo   
Kimi ga ikiteiru kagiri   
Inochi watsuzuku   
Eien ni sono chikara no kagiri   
Doko made mo tsuzuku"

Lyric Translation:

Alone for a while, I've been searching through the dark   
For traces of the love you left inside my lonely heart   
Too weave while picking up the pieces that remain   
Melodies of life, love's lost refrain 

Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why   
We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye   
And who will hear the echoes of the stories never told?   
Let them ring out loud 'till they unfold 

In my dearest memories, I see you reaching out to me   
Now you're gone… I still believe that you can call out my name 

A voice from the past, joining yours and mine   
Adding up the layers of harmony   
And so it goes, on and on   
Melodies of life, to the sky beyond the flying birds   
Forever and beyond 

So far and away, see the bird as it flies by   
Gliding through the shadows of the clouds up in the sky   
I've laid my memories and dreams upon these wings   
Leave them now and see what tomorrow brings 

In your dearest memories, do you remember loving me?   
Was it fate that brought us close and now leaves me behind? 

A voice from the past, joining yours and mine   
Adding up the layers of harmony   
And so it goes, on and on   
Melodies of life, to the sky beyond the flying bird   
Forever and on 

If I should leave this lonely world behind   
Your voice will still remember our melody   
Now I know we'll carry on   
Melodies of life   
Come circle round and grow deep in our hearts   
As long as we remember {Song belongs to Final Fantasy IX}


	5. Why Inuyahsa's POV

**InuYashsa  P.O.V.**

'_Why_' he thought as he look to the stars shinning in the dark sky. '_I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. Even the stars are dull with out you here' _Sitting in the highest branch of a lonely tree a seemingly young man continued to think. 

'_I love you, I never meant to hurt you. Then again I never do my pride just wont let me say what I my heart wants me to._' He griped the branch that currently supported him a little tighter bricking some of the bark. 

'_I know you'll never fell the way I do, but you are the first person to truly accept me as me. Not ever Kikyou did, yes she accepted me but only when she found out I'd change for her. You, you don't want that, you don't care. The only other person in my entire life how ever trusted and cared as you do where my parents.   It's been so long senses I've felt loved, or know that if something happened to me I'd be missed. You don't fell fear when you see me, but joy well at times anyway._' He smirked at that thought. 

' _And other times announce, anger, resentment to a point, but there is always happiness lasted in your sent._' His eyes began to tear, but he blinked them back. 

' _I love you and I'm sorry. I just hope you know I'll always be there for you to protect you and love you, in my own way. Even if you don't want me to I'll always watch over you, my love._' And on that thought he fell asleep under the stars.

My P.O.V.

That night as the stars watched over the two in love with each other but refused to tell one another they both had a dream. A dream in that will be the key to their hearts but when they awoke the stars and dream watchers will remembered. The question now is will they…

_nigiri shimeta te wo   hodoita nara  
tabun    kore de subete ga ima   owatte shimau_  
_shiritakatta koto   kizutsuku koto  
sae mo    nanihitotsu yarinokoshita mama de_  
_anata ga deau shiawase wo  
negaitai hazu na no ni  
dekinai mijuku na jibun ni  
fuite mo namida ga deru_  
_sayonara  
aishite-iru  
anata wo dare yori  
sora yori mo fukaku_ [1]  
_Sayonara._  
_nakanaide  
mata aou ne  
demo aenai koto  
watashi dake shitte-iru no_  
**[Instrumental]**  
_konna unmei wo   eranda koto  
itsuka    anata ni mo hontou no   imi ga wakaru wa_  
_futari tsukutta   kioku no takara  
zutto    kokoro no kakure ya de ikite'ku yo_  
_kireigoto da to omotte'ta  
kibou to iu kotoba wo  
kurushii kurai dakishimete  
anata wo miagete-iru_  
_arigatou  
aishite-iru  
anata wo dare yori  
yume yori mo tsuyoku_  
_Arigatou._  
_dakishimete  
hanasanaide  
dakedo hitokoto mo  
tsutaerarenaide..._  
**[Instrumental]**  
_nakanaide  
aishite-iru  
tooku hanarete'te mo  
anata to ikite    yukeru_

Lyric Translations: 

I can still live with you.  
If I let go of your hand clasped in mine,  
with that, it would all probably come to an end right now.  
What I wanted to know, and even what hurts me-  
Even those were left undone.  
Even though I should want to wish  
For you to find happiness,  
I can't, I'm too immature.  
I wipe the tears, but they still keep flowing.  
I love you  
more than anyone else.  
Even more deeply than the sky. [1]  
Don't cry.  
We'll meet again, right?  
But not being able to see you  
is something that only I know about.  
**[Instrumental]**  
This fate that we've chosen...  
someday you too will understand its true meaning.  
The treasure of memories that we've made  
will always live on deep inside my heart.  
I thought it was a beautiful thing,  
the word called hope.  
In an almost painful embrace,  
I'm looking up at you.  
I love you  
more than anyone else.  
Even more strongly than dreams.  
Hold me.  
Don't let go.  
But don't utter  
even a single thing...  
**[Instrumental]**  
Don't cry.  
I love you.  
Even though we're separated far apart,  
(Song from Vision of Escaflowne: don't remember the name)


	6. Decision

**Kagome P.O.V.**

'_Happiness is good health and a poor memory, And good health is simply the longest rate in which you die._' Kagome thought with a bitter smile. '_I wonder why He hasn't come and gotten me._ *Sight* _he's probable with her, the female Naraku. Then again he could be in his tree._' She blinked back her tears and wiped the cynical smile of her face. 

'_Why dose every thing remind me of him_' she looked down to her unfinished homework then to her book '**_History of Japan_**' * sweat-drop * '_OK-that doesn't count_' pushing her books aside and leaning back in her chair she came to a conclusion. 

'_Nothing is going to change unless I do something about. And  I refuse to sit back and let myself be hurt again. So either I tell him, I don't and seal the well permanently, going back and doing nothing is not an option. Or a combination, tell him and leave…Damn that jewel it is the root of all evil or is that power, but the jewel gives you power…THAT IT!!! I need caffeine. And candy. Yes Caffeine and Candy._'  

A/N: I want to that every on who reviewed.

Thank you:

Deadkitty1  
Tigerchild  
A person ^ ^   
Ame Tenshi  
Raura  
Ice Dagger  
sakuya  
Kagome  
hot-chick  
Ganymede Forvere Orbit  
KawaiiKitsune  
happykilua  
Whit  
Kat  
Granny Orbit  
dragon fire  
Thanks you all so much. And those of you who read and didn't review well, -hemp- meanies.


	7. I'm so sorry

Dear readers, I apologies but I am unable to continue my story for a bit I have 4 major test this week and next I sorry I'll write A.S.A.P. Have a nice day. 


	8. Thak you!

Thank you for your reviews and support. Chapter 7 Ashums Maiden of the Moon Granymede Forever Orbit Chapter 6 Molly Meow the chibi neko Granymede Forever Orbit Chapter 5 deadkitty1 Tigerchild A person ^_^ Ame Tenshi Chapter 4 Raura Malissa Ame Tenshi Ice Dagger Tigerchild sakuya Kagome hot-chick Granymede Forever Orbit Chapter 3 Ikanugo heir of the shikon ( I DID USE SPELLKCHEK!) Deadkitty1 Ame Tenshi KawaiiKitsune Ice Dagger happykilua Kat Chapter 2 Tigerchild Whit Chapter 1 Dragon fire Granny Orbit deadkitty1 


	9. Inuyasha's superise

**InuYashsa  P.O.V.**

'_That's it I'm going to get her, No she's better off there. But I want her here, but what of she doesn't want to be here. But what if she dose and is waiting for me to make the first move…or to apologias, few if she wants an apologia she can come here…not that I need to, but it was my fault  GOD DAMN IT! ENVEN WHEN SHE'S NOT HERE SHE CONFUSES ME! WHAT THE HELL _*sniff sniff* huh, _Kagome?_' Inuyasha ran to the well but was not prepared for what he saw. 

A/N: This is short because of the next chapter.  Read, review and thank you.


	10. The New Kagome

**My  P.O.V.**

Kagome walked into the one of the many salons in the mall. Kagome nervously sat down as her Ice-Blue eyes glancing around. ' _This is it I said that a change was in order this is simply the next steep ice blue contacts was the fist now my hair next the outfit._' 

 "So, what are we doing today?" asked a middle-aged woman with a slight French accent. 

"I-I don't know" She answered truthfully. 

"Well why don't you tell me why you're here?" she asked kindly 

"Well, I need a change…" 

"Boy trouble?" 

"How did you know?" Kagome asked slightly shocked. The woman gave a kind laugh 

" Dear I've been doing hair for a long time, and I've seen it all. Just yesterday a young girl about your age came in and said the same thing * she paused * but then again she did it to get the attention of another young girl." '_So this is the lady Usagi was talking about._' 

"I know" Kagome's thoughts where interrupted 

"Your hair is much to pretty to cut so how about we do a couple highlights?" Kagome nodded.

          "By the way, my names Babette." 

"I'm Kagome" With a smile the two began talking like old friends. Kagome told her all about Inuyasha and Kikyou…except, Inuyashsa's just a boy, Kikyou is just another bitch ex and as far as Babbet new they meet a year and a half ago, she assumed through school.  

With a good-bye and good luck Kagome went clothes shopping. She left with 20 bags. 3 full of shoes (2 pairs of ten-a-shoes, 2 pairs of boots 1 combat 1 set fashion boots, a pair of dancing shoes and a pair of pumps.).  4 bags from Hot Topics, 1 containing jeweler, 2 full of clothes, and one that has a Gothic Hello Kitty a present for a friend.  She had 2 more bags with various accessories and 1 full of make up, well lip glosses, eye shadows and glitter.  The other 10 bags where full of close form various stores. 

          When Kagome finally arrived home she was well existed, to say the lest. Going up to her room she set her bags down. Turning on her CD player she put on the soundtrack **Queen of the Damned **and turned it up as loud as it would go.  Normally she would only do that with her headphones on but every one was visiting annuity Bell in the states so she didn't care.  

Next she garbed the bags with the accessories, boots and clothes from Hot Topics.  She took out the knee high fashion boots a plaid spurt with chains that raped around it.  Next she took out a tight crimson tank top with the words Fallen Angle in black with violet wings (mind you the wings are on either side of the writing and it's written across the chest).  

Finally she took out a black velvet cooker dark blue teardrop earring and nave blue rest bands. Getting dressed she put on a bit of eye shadow that matched her earrings making her eyes stand out and the final tough cherry lip gloss.****

A/N: Ok now I need help, what color should Kagome's highlight/streaks should be:  
Silver: 'cause it goes nicely with ice-blue and contrast any dark color. The silver would be hard to see so it would look more like her hair was sparkly.  
Midnight blue: It would make her eyes stand out.  
Violet: simply because.  
White: for the same reason as the silver but you'd be able to tell.  
Pink: to through off the whole image.  
One more thing: keep the new look, eventually go back to the old- or do a mix?


	11. great, just great

Okay people listen up not only have I not gotten the reviews I wanted but sense I haven't I can't continue, But thanks to Sakrami's_Angel I have decide to do another story similar to this one only not an Inuyasha Kagome fic. The way I see they can never truly be happy for in the back of her mind she'll always question if she's just a replacement for Kikyou, but they still make a cute couple so I'm doing another one. So this story is put on hold 'cause I can't do anything tell I get the results. Thank you, have a nice day.  
  
Silver Mystic ( chibi child of the cosmos) 


	12. one week warning

Well seeing how I haven't gotten the rewies I asked for.. Meaning I can't  
continue my story I'm going to go out on a limb and say " YOU PEOPLE ARE  
MEAN AND DON'T LIKE MY STORY!"  
Therefore I'm decided to discontinue my story and if in a week if I still  
have not gotten  
any thing that will change me mind...Well then I guess I'll gust take the  
story off completely..  
  
The ever sadden Silver  
  
Silver: no one like's my story T-T  
  
Inuyasha: Damn strait bitch  
  
Kagome: Inuyasha  
Inuyasha On crap  
Kagome: SIT!  
Inuyasha: o.O  
Silver: Thanks Kagome  
Kagome: ^ ^ 


	13. I'm Back

MY POV

"WHAT THE HELL?" Inuyasha screamed in shock as he looked at Kagome.  
  
 "What?" Kagome asked innocently, "You don't like the way I look?" she turned slowly in a circle letting him see her full outfit.    
  
His eyes swept over her again and again not quite believing what he saw.  The stood the same girl whom he has fought with and beside for the past two years, and yet she wasn't.  There stud the girl whom usually wore a short grin pleated skirt with a matching white sailors blouse and scarf. Granted it wasn't very appealing but he had a nice view of her legs, unfortunately so did the monk with very questionable moral.   
  
But now she stood in front of him with the same shining black hair but now adored Indigo strips. Her eyes no longer the stormy blue but a vibrant electric blue. But the most shocking of all was what she was warring.  He normally bare lags where hidden by black foot wear (he doesn't know what fashion boots are) that went up to her knees. A red skirt that looks like that thing that she calls plaid, but not the same marital, it was 'cotton'. There was a chain of some sort around her petit waste. Her top was a crimson with word that he didn't recognize on it (it in English) the shit had violet wings on either side of the writing.  She had a black nickels around her throat and navy blue straps around her wrist.  
  
"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU?" he yelled only to relies she was no longer there. 

Kagome's POV

'_Time to go. I wonder how Inuyasha will reacted to my new look_' smirk " he'll probably yell" I whisper to my self and prepare to jump throw the well. ' _However thought to put a portal in a well has a fucked sense of humor_' Landing on the other side of the well it finally hit me that it's going to be a pain getting out.  Once out of the well I see Inuyasha.  
  
"WHAT THE HELL?" Inuyasha screamed in shock as he looked at he. '_Kagome: 1 Inuyasha: 0_'.   
  
"What?" I asked him as innocently as possible, "You don't like the way I look?" I turned slowly in a circle letting him see me fully.  '_I wonder in hanyou's can die from shock, If that's he reaction I wonder what the other will be……_'. I sigh and thinking to my self. '_I wonder how long he's going to stair'_. Getting board I decide on walking to the village he catch up.

My. P.O.V

Upon the realization that Kagome was no longer in front of him.   
  
"WECH GET BACK HER!" Inuyasha yelled and ran in direction of her sent. Mind you yelling for someone to come back and then moving might not be the best. When Inuyasha slowed down as he neared the village he noticed her sent wasn't there.  
  
 "DAMN IT WENCH WHERE ARE YOU?" he yelled in frustration. Starting to panic thinking maybe she was hurt of take he began to sniff around vigorously getting a hold of her sent once more, he fallowed it and it lead him strait to her and some one else he wasn't happy to see or smell.

A/N: Ok how was that? I made it slightly longer. T-T I know my grammars/spelling is not the best, I'm trying to do better. I've gone back over the pervious chapters fix a few things; hopefully it's better easer to read. Any suggestions you have I'd gladly take.  Oh one more thing, REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please.  You might want to go back and reread I've changed a couple of thing.


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